I am...

...currently sitting in the dark, well semi darkness. I have my nifty little Japanese house shaped lamp providing the only source of light in my dark room. The light fixture in my room needs replacing...the bulb I mean. This main one has been going crazy for the past few days. If I turn on the switch and let is sit a lil longer, it might and I say might just turn on. =____='' I need to replace the bulb but I am way too short to change them even with the little ladder. I should've just let CLK replace them for me when he was around. See now that's one good use of tall men and why I love taller men, taller than me anyway :D. Or at least have to be more than 5'6".HAHAHA...

Anyway, this sitting in the dark business isn't helping my already clouded eyesight O_o, me looking like a panda or 4-eye I should say. This will probably make my glare (eye glare?? or whatever you call it) soaring to the roof! This call for another appointment to the eye doctor. FML. And I am really worried about Jumper (who was in my previous blog post). He won't eat, he growls at me (and he never does! he is the sweetest) and he won't let me hold him. :( I am going to have to take him to the vet tomorrow. *sigh*

I am feeling slightly disturbed too. So much for some girls night tonight.

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Project 365: #50 Boyfriend withdrawal syndrome

CLK and I left for home on the same day, our flights are 35minutes apart, which kinda sucks. I guess you can't get any closer than that, right? He left me at my departure gate and just nearly missed his. No worries he's on his way. I am sitting here, on my bed at home, after what seems like a long week...with panda eyes. I think I lack sleep and been crying too much.

Although what good it bring is that I have kittens. I want to share that with you!

I am happy yet sad at the same time, aren't they adorable?

Being Away

Sorry, I have a few things to post but I am still kinda sad about losing my cat. So I need a breather...I will update on more football news (2 weeks missed!! =__=) and some other random stuff. I hope you guys have a great weekend!

via funmunch.com

DOT

It has been a rather quiet blogging days (I have been so busy!). I have been up at 530am and by 10pm I'd be looking like this =_='''. I'd sleep any chance I get. On the couch, the sofa, the comfy floor. I know! Even the floor is comfy when you are tired like hell. The airport is a scary place to be at, cause you'd have to walk, walk, walk. (Oh FYI, I am currently doing my internship at the airport, for 2 months. Hopefully I will pass my exam. Wish me luck!)

Dot died. I know you must be wondering who Dot is, she is a cat. A cat I met last night. Well she was along the side of the fence and I petted her. She responded. With a strong meow. I was so touched at how skinny she was (she was a stray!) and I decided to give her food. Tons of food. She ate just a lil bit :(. I thought she would make it cause I was determine to give her any leftovers we have. But she did not make it. :( I am sad. My Dot is gone. I found her today under my mom's car. I thought she was just sitting there but she was at the brink of letting go. Leaving this harsh world. I couldn't save her. I wish she would've come to me sooner, then maybe I could have done something. :( I am sorry Dot. 

*wipes tears* Well anywho, I have been laying kinda low. The movie The Imaginarium of Dr Parnassus just came out here (late!) and I want to watch it. Hopefully it is still out by next week. *fingers crossed* And I watched Sherlock Holmes the week it came out here. I was not disappointed. I love Holmes! The actor...errr well yeah he was good. But I would love to see Johnny Depp as Holmes. :P That would be great...but it was great anyway. The way the story was told and the effects, it was more than I expected. :) So I was happy.

So, that as much as I can write. I am freakin tired. I am waiting for the Arsenal game tonight but it will be on at midnight and I can't stay up that long!! Sucks...:(

Mood swings, yeah it's that time of month

I get effin- mad during this time of month. I get upset, I cry (yes I cry over stupid lil things), I get pissed off by little mistakes, I get really pissy and I always seem to throw it all at CLK. I sometimes get upset with him, even tho it was clearly nothing to be upset about. I get 'irrational'. (Yes I know, I admit I'm irrational when I'm upset, or I'm upset and get irrational, but I can't help it.) Yes. I. Can't help it. I get pissy, I cry- a lot. Sometimes it makes me feel a lot better about myself. Other times, I just get more upset.


But you know sometimes I just needed that someone to not try to understand why I'm upset. Just let me be. (OK I don't want to let me 'be' I need someone to give me hugs and tell me everything is going to be OK.)

(What? I just want some lovin'.)

Clearly, sometimes that message don't come across. It sometimes come across as 'leave-me-fuckin'-alone-I-don't-want-to-talk-to-you-now'. Which really sucks. I do admit it's a mistake in my part. But that's ego talking. I don't wanna go, 'please hold me, I want you to make it all better'. Sissy. But really, that's what I'm saying. *sigh*


CLK always seems to be optimistic about things. Like now, I'm in my PMS-ing state, really annoying if you ask me. If I was my boyfriend I'd really be annoyed. But no. He's like all 'I know you're in your mood swing, pms thing so I think I need to leave you alone'. Like what? So cool. I mean, yeah I'm in my PMS thing but I don't want to be alone. :( *pout* And yes, I am being difficult. I am being irrational. I am being stupid. But I don't want to be alone. What am I talking about? I don't know. Sometimes I don't get myself. Being irrational. *sigh*


I don't want to be irrational. (Yes I am definitely IRRATIONAL) but sometimes I can't help myself. Sometimes I feel like yapping and biting peoples' heads off (mostly CLK cause I talk to him a lot and he happens to trigger my irrational mode when I'm upset (which usually happens over idiotic things he say or I just feel like he don't want to talk to me) which is, irrational). See? I don't understand myself. *spins round and round* I'm upset, can't you tell? (and I have no idea what's the point of this post)


I need a rest and clear my mind. Oooo, orchestra practice tonight, yummy. Mind-clearing time.

*psst, PMS survival tips*